>>>>>>>

Look at the right side...

It shows that I'm going home in a month time..

Can't wait to see everybody.. especially  AMIRA....

Table-less

After few hours advertising on freecycle.com...

Got a few e-mails from people who are interested... So, yeay for me ! A lady will come and pick up my table tomorrow evening.. and then, a couple will come on Saturday to take my shelf.. They said, they want it for their daughter's room..

What is freecycle ? Basically, it's a website where people advertise things that they don't want anymore and recycle it by giving it away to people who wants it.. So, better for the environment la kan ? hehe..

Some people said, nape tak jual je ? Well, I don't care about the money.. Just want to get rid of it really.. lgpun beli nye tak seberapa pun.. and dah pakai 3 thn.. bg je la kat org.. hehe...

Ok, need to unscrew my table..

Ta ~~

Gugur rambutku

I'm stressed ! Need to get rid of soom furniture.. So, have been trying to get the british heart foundation people to come and take it.. But then, can't find a suitable time for them to come as they don't do collections on weekends..

So now, I am advertising it on freecycle.com.. Seriously need to get rid of my big furniture before Sunday as we are planning to do massive cleaning and packing this weekend.. help me ! :(

Why do you need friends ?

So that, you can always turn back to them when u are having a bad day !

Started at 8.00 am this morning (left the house at 7.20am)... and then finished trauma teaching at 5.40pm.. so, got back after 6.00... Just want a friend to give me a hug... and watch tv together.. or do something other than medicine..

p/s : I'm 23, will be 24 soon... and I hate being treated like a child.. or like a school kid... Come on la... Doctors were students once..

Gumbira di ACM...

I'm loving it.. Have to write this down before I totally forgot about today.. I'm feeling so high.. over the moon.. can't stop smiling !!!!

Started acute care module yesterday.. Every morning, we'll go to theatre for some anaesthetic experience... OMG !!! Feels like screaming..

This morning, I was supposed to be with this scary lady anaesthetist.. But then, Dr. R came to OT 3 and just asked me to follow him, leaving my partner behind.. I was thinking, why me ? have I done anything wrong ? but then, apparently, he had no student with him.. And I had the most productive day today ! YEAY ! Senyum sampai telinga !!

So, firstly, he asked me to mix some drugs ! I was a bit shocked and lost la at that time.. And then, he asked me to do it step by step.. So, wallaaa.... I got the co-amoxiclav ready for the IV injection.. And then, he asked me whether I have done venflons or not before, and dgn malu2 kucingnya, I said yes... So, he asked me to do the venflon on that patient.. Mmg time ni muka pucat gila sebab tgh panic and mcm shocked to the system.. tak expect nak wat ape2 pun ari ni.. Had to insert a green venflon.. quite big.. sebelum ni penah buat pink and blue je... And yeay ! I got it in...

And then he asked me whether I have intubated a patient before... And cuak gle time tu.. And I said only on dummies... and guess what he said ? "It's your lucky day as the patient has no front teeth".. I was like, what ???? Yes.. Sebab kalo tak de gigi depan kurang la risk nak hancurkan gigi patient.. kalo ade gigi consultant lg prefer buat sendiri...

And then, after dia dah inject propofol... he asked me to insert the oropharyngeal airway...

And then had to bg oxygen to the patient guna mask... just realised how difficult it is to hold the mask and did jaw trust and head tilt.. Mmg sakit tgn smpai terketar but buat2 berani and asik ckp I'm fine dekat consultant.. haha... Mmg menggunakan biceps and triceps.. First few minutes, he kept on saying, u got leakage there.. Sampai dah O2 sats naik 100% baru rasa lega sket.. Lepas tu, came the big thing, intubate !! And I did it.. yeay ! but obviously consultant was there and if I did not do it properly, he would take over la kan..

For the 2nd patient, I mixed the drugs jugak.. Antibiotics je la pun.. And then, he asked me to do the venflon eventho it's a difficult one.. Sebab veins dia agak fragile and kecik2.. And said, i'm only allowed one chance and kalo tak lepas, dia akan buat sendiri.. So, i tried using a pink one which is smaller.. and yeay, it's in... So, senyum smpai telinga la sebab dpt pujian... And this patient got spinal and bukan GA, so tgk je la.. And then, lepas tu, he taught me on how to do spinal and epidural... membazir harta NHS sebab byk gle needles and pack yg dia bukak utk ajar... Tried buat epidural dekat the consultant's hand as an imagination of the back.. don't worry.. didn't actually stab him...

It was a good day indeed and mmg high gle skang ni.. rasa nak buat anaesthetic pulak.. and it's my rezeki that he asked me to follow him sebab my partner had an awful day... :( But I have this feeling that it will all change from tommorow and I will end up having horrible days.. haha...

Muka pucat and panic gle the whole day because was given too much responsibility... So, kept on being asked whether I'm going to faint or not.. haha.. sah2 la tak.. setakat ni tak penah lg la pengsan dlm OT.. but then, sapa tak panic ble kena buat benda2 yg tak penah buat on the patient.. And then waktu I had to bag the patient, he kept on saying, u are breathing for the patient now.. so, do it properly..

And apparently, students are not covered for some procedures contohnya intubate and I was technically doing it without any insurance and tak covered... tu dia la ckp.. So, ape2 pun consultant la kena tanggungjawab...

Ok.. need to get back to reality... Mmg letih gila2.. hari2 start kul 8.. and then teaching kul 1 smpai 5... Mmg la hardcore gila..

Chocolate cupcakes :)

We had medical meeting last Friday and got some choc cupcakes... And I came back today feeling that I should bake something.. Found out that I actually have everything that I need for a simple choc cuppies.... Did not have any sprinkles for deco and found some white choc chips instead.. So, waallaaaa..... Rezeki budak dekat Royal Glamorgan esok.. ;)

Dah abis choc powder and self raising flour.. kurang brg nak angkat pindah nanti.. hehe...

p/s : Happy Birthday Angah..  Can't wait to see u !!! muahsss



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Lunch at Lilo's

So, we all went for a lunch yesterday to celebrate our passing.. :)

Zira-Wina-Mia

 My banana-mango juice

 Me and Zira

With Shahirah who came from Manchester

May Allah bless us and insyaAllah we'll be doctors in a year time.. :)

Packing !

I definitely hate packing.. The house is in a mess.. And you figured out how much junk u actually collected after 3 years... :(

 And it's quite sad.. After 3 years, we are actually moving out... But life goes on ! 

 My things so far....

 Jen's junk that are going to storage..

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DSM

Have to finish off all my cases if I want to get sign off for DSM !
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:(

Nak nangis la !!! Dah la homesick.. pastu placement macam sampah... LEAs mmg mcm sgt2 annoying.. nak kena siapkan 3 cases by the end of this week.. ARGH !!

And I'm home alone.. And placement langsung tak best... haematology sgt2 menyakitkan hati.. and I'M MISSING HOME LIKE CRAZY !

Paranoid

There's a reason why sometimes I'm a bit angry.. or anxious... It's because I'm PARANOID ! I know that since forever.. And I think my knowledge in medicine sometimes made it worse.. hehe...

So, don't blame me when I become angry when you don't answer my calls and don't reply my texts.. because my imagination is wild...

Homesick..

Congratulations to my dearest Along and Abg Shah for the the new baby.. She's so cute and geram la tgk !!! Making me missing home more and more... I wish I'm a billionaire and can fly home only for the weekend... :(

So... Finally it's the weekend !!!!!!! PHEW... It's been a tiring week.. I can talk here for ages but I know there are some people who just hate it and then will say something on facebook.. Hey miss, if u don't like something, then don't read my blog la ok ???

This week has been manic.. We start at 8.15 everyday and usually finishes by 4.30-5.. Having to travel for half an hour every morning and evening, making it worse... I'm not the one driving obviously.. but having to find lifts and begging for people to take me with them is tiring enough.. lol... But, so far it's still alright..

I started DSM (Diagnostic synthesis medicine) with Haematology for 2 weeks.. Serious rasa nak terjun bangunan ble dpt timetable.. APAKAH ? I just did haem like 2 months ago and this is not what I'm expecting.. Everybody else got general med teams like respiratory, cardiology, endocrine, gastro and acute med.. Those are what I wantes because I seriously need to refresh my memory.. We did general med in 3rd year and I think it's a bit rusty now.. And then our timetable is organised like the previous haem placement duirng MOSS.. which means we had to go to the lab !! ARGH !!! It's just not fair because this placement is supposed to polish our history, exam, and diagnostic skills as the preparation for foundation year... It's a final year placement mind you... And we also have to do a long list of skills which obviously I don't know where I'm going to find patients to do it on.. lol... Basically, my partner and I are hating it big time... We have decided that maybe next week, we are going to try and make our consultant understand this and allow us to go and find something else in MDU or A&E.. haha...

As usual, Cardiff Med School made our life more eventful by sending an e-mail on Monday saying that results will be published on Wednesday instead of Tuesday 14 June.. so, a week earlier... And causing us to panic... Came Wednesday morning we had teaching at 8.15.. Did I tell u that there's no coverage/signal in royal glam,... which means that i can't text or check anything on my phone (eventho I can get the internet on my phone.. So, obviously la pikiran tak tenang dlm teaching that morning.. Abis teaching, I went to library to check the pass list.. So, having to go through 300+ numbers to fine your number is scary... But alhamdulillah found it.. And the transcript came the next day which I'm just grateful about.. Alhamdulillah.. bersyukur sgt2...

And Friday morning, when I woke up for Subuh I got mama's text and Abg Shah's whatsapp regarding the new baby... Sincerely, I seriously thought that I will lose the excitement after Adlina and Ariff.. but I don't know why I'm still excited and can't wait to see this little girl who will obviously steal abah's attention and climb up his knees... Can't wait to go shopping and get something for baby A to wear maybe during raya.. hehe...

Ok.. need to go now before I start crying again because I'm missing home.. ngeh..

Soon...

Will update soon insyaAllah... Super duper busy now... sebab hari2 kuar umah kul 7.30 pg balik kul 6 ptg.. and keletihan terus ketiduran.. hehe..

Alhamdulillah I passed my 4th year exam.. Final year it is then.. Soon enough insyaAllah i'll be a doctor and will be back home for good.. hooooyeahh !!!

p/s : Praying for Along's safety tomorrow.. insyaAllah it will be fine..

Ironing for the next few weeks..

Since placement dah nak start esok.. I have to do a major ironing project.. After weeks of no placement, baju yg dah iron dlm wardrobe dah kena reiron balik.. Haish.. Kalo la iron baju leh bg kurus, kan bagus..
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Home Alone..

The day is finally here...

After 3 years of living together, it's now come to an end.. Megan has moved out last Thursday.. But she will be back to do the final cleaning before end of this month..

While Jen will leave for Wrexham today.. She's all packed and will come back to move her boxes into storage in few weeks time...

And... I will be ALL BY MYSELF for the next 3 weeks.... Because my placement is in Royal Glamorgan, Llantrisant... And then, moi will move out as well into the new crib... but will be by herself as well till 27 JULY.. :(

I don't know how I'm feeling... Feels like crying but at the same time I feel empty inside... I don't know where this friendship will go.. I mean which direction... Katie will be in Bangor for a year to interclate, Jen is not getting a house and has asked for all her placements to be away (North Wales), Lizzie is staying at home (Porthcawl), Anna is staying at home (Monmouth), Nina at home as well (Bristol), Alice will be moving home (Bridgend)....

See... It's going to be a tough year... And I do admit that I HATE changes !!! I know it should be a good one... but I just don't like it... hurm... Keep on having sleepless nights..

At the same time, we are starting DSSM tomorrow.. Officially we have started 5th year last Thursday... The intro lectures were scary.. enough said.. It made me feel crap... There are so many things that need to be covered... and finals is in 9 months time... And they are piloting a gazzilion things for our year... Different portfolios and stuff... ARGH !!!

I'm still in my holiday mood and now will have to restart my brain.... :(

So far

That's how much I have packed so far.. Haha.. Byk lg barang !! Haish.. Mai UK bawak satu luggage ja.. Ni beranak pinak bercucu semua ada..


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